CHAPTER 21: I LOVE MY BABY BUT, WHO DO WE LISTEN TO?

Whitney Port3 comments1454 views
Having or just had a baby and experiencing a million different people telling you ​a million different opinions??? Yeah, same here. Having a baby is a totally new experience. One that we look to others to help guide us through. But what happens when TOO many people tell you too many things??

When word got out I was pregnant, I got 5 different excel spreadsheets alone with every product I ever possibly needed. While I am SUPER appreciative of all the info., it gets very overwhelming and I constantly ask myself, who do I listen to? In this Chapter of I Love My Baby But, Timmy and I discuss how we navigate through the magnitude of opinions and when we let our instincts lead the way. How have you guys dealt with this? Curious to know!

3 Comments

  1. I randomly came across your blog and I’m so glad I did. My daughter is almost 19months now and watching your video of breastfeeding totally triggered me and brought me back to that anxiety ridden difficult time. I did basically everything you said and felt everything you felt. I remember one night,
    Around 3 am (it’s always 3am right?)I was breastfeeding her in bed and every time she latched it felt like glass on my nipple so I would unlatch her and try to relatch but the more I did that the more mad she became because I’m sure she was hungry and now frustrated. Finally, she was screaming so much that I just took it. I just let her eat and took the pain. And I remember tears streaming down my face and feeling so much. I felt so alone, so much responsibility, and so guilty for it all. Anyway, I hope you got through it. You know how sometimes you don’t realize how far past something you are and then all of a sudden a smell, a song, or random Saturday night blog video will just bring you right back.

    Motherhood is really wonderful and really hard and ever changing. Just when you think you have mastered something with them they flip the switch. For me, being a working mom (I’m a costume designer for a tv show) I struggle with being the mom I thought I would be and the mom I think I am. I don’t know. I’m so grateful for her and am forever changed by this new awareness . Good luck to you! You’ll be great. Xx

    1. This is so absolutely true! I have 2 toddlers now and when i hear or read stories like this one, i always go back to that moment in time when I was going through those emotions and learning, then look at my kids now and realize how fast it passed and how eternal it felt at that time.

      Breastfeeding is hard, my son (first) never latched, but i committed to pumping for as long as i could and made it to 6 months (i also supplemented with formula as i didnt produce enough). I also felt so attached to the pump, to the schedule, to everything the first 3 months. I kept telling myself that we are both learning as we go, he is new and i was also new at this. With my daughter it was a total opposite experience, she latched from the very first time, i was only in pain for the first week until my boobs got used to it, and then i also felt this anguish and frustration because i was the only one that could feed her and she only wanted me but i wanted some alone time…the guilt never ends as a mom, we are always overthinking everything we do.

      Stick to your instinct, you know him like no one else does. even better than your husband. My husband would always worry about certain things and i never worried much, we would end up going to the doctor for my husband’s peace of mind, only to confirm that it was nothing (like i thought!). A mother’s instinct is a crazy thing! I always thought my mom was a witch, not i understand.

      best of luck!! you’re doing great!

  2. Hi Whitney,
    After 3 weeks the intestines starts to work. So your instinct is right. Gas poop cramp. Completely normal. It takes en view weeks. If you are going to change your dieet than your baby has to get used to that again what will give him this signs again.
    I put my baby in a carrying bag that helpt him a lot.
    In the Netherlands we have something named: oei ik groei (oops im growing)
    They have a website. On te site you will find every mental en body changes. Studies find out that baby’s have hops in specific weeks of there lifes. At first i did not believe in it but after 3 hops… they were right.
    Google ” oei ik groei sprongetje ” if you select image you will see al the hops. The black parts are the weeks your baby will/can act different (there is a lot) the clouts are the worst parts and the sun are the best.
    It helpt me a lot in the first yaer. After a few months you will think: oh its a hop. Cuddels cuddels and cuddels will help.

    I know you dont whant any advice but i think this will help you through the first your a lot!

    Dont fotget to enjoy!
    Franciska

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