Hi guys!
I want to start this off by thanking from the bottom of my heart! Over the weekend, I experienced anxiety in relation to the anticipation of this week. I get this a lot. I anticipate things too much instead of living in the moment.
My schedule has been very packed every day and looking at it over the weekend was causing me so much panic. I tried my very best to not look at my calendar and handle, but I eventually had to wave my white flag. I asked you guys for advice in an Instagram post, and I am overwhelmed by the amazing advice you guys shared. I wanted to make a post here to share some of what you said! Thank you so much for always being there for me and for showing so much love in our wonderful community we have.
xo,
Whit
- When I’ve been anxious lately, I’ve been doing a body scan meditation that has been helping. I sit on the floor with my back against my bed, close my eyes. I breath in for 3 seconds or so and breath out for 3 seconds. I think about how my head feels, then my eyes, then ears, then mouth and go all the way down my body. Acknowledging that I have these parts. Keeps my thoughts from racing and forcing myself in the moment and how I feel. I recommend. I learned it from my therapist ❤️
- I understand that anticipation anxiety. Whenever it starts to happen, this might sound strange, but I literally force myself to think about something else. In my head I say “Stop. Stop thinking about this” and then will either think of a good memory I have logged away or I will pull out some paper and just start writing about something that happened over the week. Sounds mundane but I have found it helpful.
- Take a deep breath and remember who you are! A beautiful interesting complicated wonderful unique special wholesome energetic woman with many roles and balls in the air and it’s ok if some of them fall to the wayside for a moment while you just breath and enjoy your time relaxing with your loves! Also, a root tea or tart cherry juice or throw together a smoothie 🙂 couldn’t hurt, might help! 😘
- Something I do to help my anxiety is to list off the things in my life that make me feel happy, lucky and bring me joy. Sometimes I’ll even try and take the things I am most anxious about, and find ways to turn them into things I am grateful for. And whenever possible, find the humor amidst all the chaos! A good laugh at the craziness can sometimes be so very healing. 💛 PS: I also wanted to thank you for being so open about your recent struggles… I’m so sorry you have been through so much. 💗 It takes incredible strength to tell your story to the world. But the more that women in the spotlight normalize talking about the hardest parts of being a woman, the more women can feel empowered to speak up about their journeys. And speaking our truth can be an incredible panacea to stress and anxiety.
- Sometimes when I’m in this situation, I’ll look back at pictures of my babies from a year ago or longer, and think “wow, they were so little… it went by so fast” and it helps ground me in that moment. Every stage of their life is temporary. Enjoy ❤️
- Meditation. You can even try a guided meditation for practicing being in the present moment. Anxiety/worry is fear of what has yet to happen, so practicing being present in this moment is a great tool!
- It helps me to remind myself life wasnt meant to be easy and when u fall on hard times remember when your battling the things you cant control that one thing life is all about is how we react to the things we cant control and focus on how to react so later you will feel good about your reaction 💕
- So I KNOW that feeling is super frustrating, but the GOOD thing is, it’s just a habitual way of thinking and habits can be broken! 🙌🏼 1, Brain Dump. Get a sheet of paper and write down everything you have to do the next week, everything that could go wrong, and all the things you’re worrying about. Get it out of your head and on to paper. Weed out the tasks that are important and are within your control, prioritize them, and write them on a separate list you can keep handy. Then, rip up the brain dump paper and THROW IT IN THE TRASH!! And feel that release of letting all that shit go. Next, what helps me when I feel myself slipping into unhelpful thought patterns, is a positive mantra. Just something quick that you can repeat to yourself to put a hard stop on those old thoughts. Yours could be something about being present, and how all we have is right now? Then repeat it to yourself OFTEN! In the morning, in the shower, in the car, and especially when you feel those worrisome thoughts creeping back in! What also helps is picking some “anchors,” like a piece of jewelry, or a picture in your home, your favorite song, etc…and assign how you WANT to be feeling to those anchors. (Don’t forget to feel it in your body!) Then when you see them, they’ll act like gentle reminders to bring you back to the present moment and get you grounded in the now. Hope that helps! ❤️
- I have found that doing a little activity or something to look forward to with my kids during the week really helps calm my anxieties by everything that I have to get done. It doesn’t have to be huge. We recently got a few caterpillars and my kids look forward to checking them out every day to see if they have crystallized and are going to turn into butterflies. You don’t really have to do anything for them, just get a milkweed plant and get a butterfly enclosure net and they’ll do their own thing. It’s not a big thing but it’s such a huge thing for us to do together in my kids eyes. I actually look forward to checking out those little guys every morning and every night to see what they’re up to!
- Actually schedule down time during the week (4-6pm do nothing time). Sometimes all that’s needed is one afternoon to feel caught up!
- Practicing mindfulness ❤️ It takes time to learn, but it is so effective 👏
- Put your phone down and away somewhere and remember these moments are only here right now. The calendar will be there once he’s asleep. That’s what I do to remind myself when I find myself not being in the moment with my son.
- Mine is breathing while engaging my mind. So I breathe in and say the word of what I see in front of me in between breaths. Engaging my mind w the breaths has been transformative. 💞
- A little bit of guided meditation helps me combat my ‘working mum life’ anxieties. There are plenty of apps available but My fave is Insight Timer. It takes a little practice at first but 10 minutes a day is all it takes and once you get into a habit I find it helps free up space to focus on my little tribe and their needs and leaves Monday’s stresses until then. Good luck
- Practise! I struggled with this for so long. You have to force yourself to be “unproductive” in order to build the REAL productivity with fully charged batteries for whatever lies ahead! After a few weekends of forcing relaxation, it comes more naturally 💜.
- Park time and Board games saved my life during graduate school. It was simple and effective. Helped me stay present.
- Daily meditation. It takes about two to three weeks of consistent practice to kick in, and then it will consistently change your state of mind for the better.
- I’ve followed your social since Sonny was born (a month after my own little guy!) and I just love your vulnerability so much!! I relate to a lot of what you go through with the mom guilt and self analyzing. The greatest thing I’m learning as a mom, wife and business owner is to say no to things that really don’t matter in the long run (work functions, social obligations, even relationships). If you’re taking on opportunities that negate your joy (whether it be in motherhood, marriage, self care…) don’t force yourself to take them on. Life is short and your peace is more important than some of the obligations stressing you out. ❤️🙏🏻
- Anxiety hypes things up and makes you feel overwhelmed by a busy looking schedule. Remember that you’re only human. Prioritize your day by what HAS to get done, and be flexible with everything else. I’m always surprised by what extra things I manage to get done in small increments of time throughout a busy day 😘
- Tell your friends and family that you need a self-care Sunday. Turn your phone off and disconnect for the day and try to take a digital detox. It’s okay to take time for your mental health, and to focus on your time with your family. Take care Whitney 💜
- Get out into nature! Going for a walk on the beach is always good!
- I love the app headspace. It helped me learn how to meditate and seriously helped my anxiety
- For me, just recognizing when I’m thinking ahead and telling myself that’s it’s ok that it happens but I’m more relaxed when I can bring myself back to the present really helps. I find coming at it from a place of being gentle with myself about it being a process really helps (it can be so tough not to come from a judgmental place). I also find I get more anxious faster when I’m hangry so snacks on the weekend honestly help me a ton, too. 💗💗💗
- Mindfulness works great for me. Focus on one thing and only that one thing and bring yourself back in the moment when you drift. Radical acceptance also works well. Radically accept that your week is going to be crazy and there ia nothing that you can do about it
- Lists so you can plan the week ahead and make the most of relaxing at the weekend
- Writing my Monday to do list and filling in my planner for the coming week on FRIDAY has made the biggest difference in separating my week ahead from the weekend. Working for yourself can leave you working 100% of the time and this habit has created definitive “work hours” for me. If something comes to mind during the weekend that I need to do the following week, I add it to the to-do list but that’s the extent of it. Putting it on paper, removes its burden from my mind. Good luck!! 💗
- Do your best in letting everything else go, trusting that life and universe will take care of it all. Enjoy some good laughter today, the kind that hurts your stomach! 💛life is to short .
- Meditate. Journal. Cook a delicious meal. Go in to nature. Create something. Count your blessings. 💛
- Make family plans.Something that’s the same every week? Pancakes for breakfast or go out, every Saturday or Sunday. Park days. Pick a spot and that’s what you do… also leave your phone at home… even if it’s just for a couple hours.
- Put your phone out of reach. Enjoy your family. You will always have work, but you won’t always have these tiny moments of nothingness with your teeny one 💙
- Lavender oil. Big glass of water. Journal about all the things you’re worried about, looking forward to and/or hoping for in the next week or two. Sometimes writing it all down helps you leave it there and be present. 💜
- I set aside an hour on Friday to plan for the next week (look at my calendar, plan meals, plan outfits, whatever it is) so I don’t have to think about it on the weekend, and then I can just get up and go knowing I have everything planned out on Monday. It has taken quite a while to be able to fit that into an hour, but I slowly got organized in other areas of daily life (morning and evening routines, meals, daily routines for work) so that it doesn’t take as long as it used to. I also make sure I wake up an hour earlier than needed each day so I’m not rushed, no matter if it’s needed or not. I can just drink my coffee and wake up! This has made ALL THE DIFFERENCE!
- It’s hard to not think about future plans when there’s prior preparation that needs to happen. Choose a time in the morning or night to just go over your plans and make a list of what you might need in case you need to go out to buy something for said plans. After that time, don’t think about it. Put your phone on airplane mode or do not disturb. Focus on being present. Everything else can wait for you won’t have this moment again.
- take some time to write a brief outline of what needs to be done before the events on your calendar. include timelines so you feel more prepared. whenever you notice you are not in the current moment, remind yourself about the conscious effort you have made to relax. the purpose of your anxious thoughts are to remind you that you care about the events coming up and want to be prepared. having a list of what needs to be done and when can help you feel prepared so when the worry starts, you are ahead of the game, you are more prepared. the more you continually practice being in the present, the easier it will be to shift your mind when you notice you are anxious and worried.
- (This is what I tell myself…) You have your plan in place. And it will unfold as it should. Disconnect, take a deep breath and compartmentalize. You won’t regret living in the moment but you might regret missing the moment living in the future. Sometimes I write lists of things for the week ahead to get it out of my mind and onto paper! You set an intention to relax, so do what you need to do to stick to it! 💞
- On Fridays, write out a plan for the next week by making a “must do” list for every day, but stretch it out among the five days. If that’s not enough, on Friday, plan your whole Monday with times and stick to it. It keeps my kindergarten teacher brain focused and allows me to fully be present on the weekend!
- It’s so hard sometimes, especially as the mom, you feel the need to triple make sure all is in order for a busy week(s). You could try planning to do actual things doing your weekend, instead of just trying to do nothing. Like I find it helpful sometimes if I make myself sit and play a game or blocks or whatever, with the kids. Like trying to purposely be present. Or sit and watch a movie. It just helps to have something that your doing to keep your mind off of other things. And put phones or calendars out of view! That helps too. 💗 Hope you can find that peace with your family this weekend. 🙂
